Naughty Garden Gnomes, Underpants Gnomes & More!

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Other famous gnomes include the Underpants Gnomes of South Park fame. (For those who have never heard of South Park, it's an animated series starring four charmingly foul-mouthed eight-year-old boys who, as any PTA mother will tell you, presage the end of civilization as we know it). The Underpants Gnomes much more closely resemble traditional gnomes in appearance than do the online gnomes. However, real gnomes generally frown on their antics, because the Underpants Gnomes spend their nights stealing underpants from people. They're convinced that if they collect enough underpants, they'll profit handsomely. The only problem is that none of them knows what the connection between underpants and profits is -- they all assume someone else does.

Now, first of all, gnomes would never do something as silly as stealing underpants. Second of all, they would never go into business with such a nebulous business plan; they would map everything out very carefully before they ever made a move. (Tony Robbins has nothing on gnomes). Thirdly, they'd never take part-time jobs as elves in the Christmas season, like the Underpants Gnomes do. That's just so déclassé.

Hollywood Gnomes

Gnomes have also figured in various other TV shows and movies; we've already talked about Amélie, which depicts the horror of gnomegnapping. Gnomes most recently appeared on TV in 2005, during the ninth season of the animated series "King of the Hill." In this episode, Peggy Hill becomes enamored with a gnome named Winklebottom, whom she proudly displays in their front yard. Her husband hates it; and when Winklebottom is injured, Hank Hill uses the opportunity to, ahem, get rid of it, telling Peggy he was stolen. Because Peggy is devastated by Winklebottom's loss, Hank travels all the way to a German tourist town and adopts a new gnome, Figgleforth. Peggy is delighted and vows to keep Figgleforth inside the house for his safety, which makes Hank happy too -- until he gets so creeped out by Figgleforth living in his bedroom that he can't undress in its presence. So you see, in the end, the gnomes always win.

On to part eleven :: Free the Garden Gnomes! Adoption, Domestication, or Slavery?
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